Halfway into treatment

1 Peter 5:7 says “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for us”. These words are becoming all too familiar. When my oncologists discharged me home from my inpatient treatment, they told me one very important thing: "Make sure you stress over things less." Ha! How would they have known that cancer was not going to be the biggest thing in my life this year? They couldn't have known that I will have to learn "not to stress" over WAR in my beloved Ukraine, and the possible death of my loved ones at any moment from 2/24/2022 and on? However, they did know one thing about me. I am a believer in Jesus, the One who takes my burdens and carries them. And so... "I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. " Psalm 121:1-2 I gave my cancer up to God, and jumped right into Ukraine relief work. If I wasn't currently undergoing cancer treatment, I would totally be in Ukraine or Poland serving. But... that was not meant to be, so I jumped into work from the US. Fundraisers, missionary support, evacuation planning, humanitarian aid, planning of food deliveries for eastern Ukraine, prayer, prayer, prayer, etc. At one point, I forgot about cancer in my life. The heartbreak and pain over Ukraine was so strong that I could not sleep or function. But.. Every time I'd lift my eyes up to the mountains, He would remind me to continue trusting Him. And I would. Tomorrow marks 6 weeks since I started the home medication regimen. I am also still doing my weekly high dose vitamin infusions. I am grateful that I do not have to undergo chemo infusions and radiation treatments, but I will say that the side effects of some of my meds are NO FUN! Between the stress of war in the homeland, and the side effects, I caught myself on the couch around 7pm some evenings unable to get up, look at the light, listen to those around me or even get up. There was no cooking dinner. There was no smiling. There was lots of discomfort in what seemed like every vital system of my body. But, guess what? Every morning, I pulled the window panels, looked at the mountains and found strength to move, plan my day, and even smile to my family. We learned to pray together lots, and God answered most of our prayers to date. I know He will answer the rest. As I celebrate the halfway mark of my home treatment, I also count my blessings. I got to keep my hair! I am able to work some! I still have a 4.0 in my doctorate program that (guess what?) I am still working on through my cancer. My family prays together. My family loves each other so much more now. I learned who my friends are. I was humbled by their love and generosity. I learned how to nourish and heal my body with nutrition. I learned how loving my God truly is. And so on... I am blessed! Next steps: 6 more weeks of home treatment! I can do it! PET scan tomorrow (4/1/21) to see if there are any tumors in my body. This will be the deciding factor in how my treatment will look like moving forward. If I grow a tumor anywhere, back to inpatient treatment I go at the end of this month. If not, I wait until July when I go back for a 10-day treatment boost. Meanwhile, I celebrate! So, I put on my Waymaker T-shirt, pray for Ukraine, and go off to sleep. Tomorrow is the big day. God is good. All the time.